Seven Caring Habits and Seven Deadly Habits

I'm going to oversimplify this a bit, but it all boils down to this:  most of our unhappiness and misery comes from unsatisfactory relationships (the Seven Deadly Habits).  If we would learn how to build our relationships so that they are need satisfying instead (the Seven Caring Habits), then we stand a much better chance of feeling happy / content.  It's easier said (or read) than done though!

Getting rid of ineffective habits is difficult work!  Just ask anyone who's tried to kick smoking, or overeating - old habits die hard.  The best way to rid ourselves of bad (ineffective) habits is to replace them with new effective habits.  I remember reading some brain/cognitive research which indicated that you had to perform a new habit for a minimum of 21 days before you could expect it to be a part of your behavioral repertoire.  So,  to eliminate the old, bad (ineffective) habits, we must practice these new effective habits for at least every day for the next 21 days!

The Seven Deadly Habits are:

• criticizing
• blaming
• complaining
• nagging
• threatening
• punishing
• bribing / rewarding to control

 (How many of these deadly habits do you regularly engage in?  I didn't like the answer when I asked it of myself)

The Seven Caring Habits are:

• supporting
• encouraging
• listening
• accepting
• trusting
• respecting
• negotiating differences

I'm resolved to do better in the upcoming year (and for the next 21 days especially!).  I hope that I can learn to make the Caring Habits a part of my everyday routine.  We'll see if my wife, kids and coworkers notice the difference in me at the end of the month.

You can read more about the Seven Caring Habits and Seven Deadly Habits from this website: http://wglasser.com/index.php?option=com_content&task=view&id=12&Itemid=64